DVD Review – Assault On Wall Street (2013)

Assault On Wall Street depicts the story of Jim Baxford (‘Prison Break‘ star, Dominic Purcell), an ex-military man. He’s adapted to life back home working in security, he’s got some coffee shop drinking buddies, a nice little home and a loving wife, Rosie (Erin Karpluk). Rosie is overcoming a fatal brain tumour and is now hoping to start planning a family with Jim. However, the radical medical treatments that Rosie needed exceeded the limit of the couple’s medical insurance.

Jim looks to cash in his war pension which he put in the stock market; his broker admits they lost the money in a bad investment. Seeking advice from a high price attorney about getting his money back, he has to borrow a further $10,000 before the attorney will help. Surprise, surprise the attorney can’t help him, and events unfold further pushing the once happy husband to a man over the edge. Wait, let me rephrase that, a man over the edge with an assault rifle in his closet!

Uwe Boll the man, the monster, behind several movie adaptations of ’90s PlayStation games (House Of The Dead, Alone In The Dark) directs the story of a man driven over the edge by the fat cats of Wall Street. So my question is, why is this film such a slow burner? The film runs near 100 minutes, but Dominic’s character doesn’t bring out the heavy artillery until the last half hour of the movie. You have to sit for an hour and watch this man get his life ruined in all directions, to be honest I would imagine that most of you would rather just kill yourselves 45 minutes in.

You could almost describe this movie as star studded; it’s filled to the brim with stars from yesteryear. You’ll be delighted to see the likes of Edward Furlong, John Heard, Keith David, Eric Roberts and Clint Howard haven’t all washed up dead somewhere after escaping the gusty jaws of Sharknado.

There are zero Special Features on the DVD but the film itself is decent enough, probably a higher standard for Uwe Boll compared to some of the other films he’s churned out over the years. Want my honest opinion? Wait until it is streaming online or, as they said in the old days, wait until it’s on the telly. It’s not worth getting burned with a purchase.